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Back in a groove...

Well, Mom & Dad left to go back to MD today.  I was so happy that they stayed with us, for Mom's sake I know prolong the inevitable...they're going home to an empty house.  No Mom-mom waiting, no pups to feed and put out, just quiet. 

I'm praying for Mom today because I know it's going to be a long drive home and for Dad because he needs continued strength to support Mom.  But on my way to work, I started crying and couldn't figure out why. 

Then it hit me...I needed this visit just as much as Mom did.  I miss Mom-mom too.  I can't call her on my break at work, can't hear her voice whenever, and won't see her when I go to MD for Steven's wedding in a little over a month.

I guess I just have to take my own advice.  Get back in a groove.  One step at a time.  When grief feels heavier than the clouds which overcast the sky this morning, we truck on...and like Mom-mom LOVED to stay, we "Put our BIG GIRL panties on, and deal with it!"  Miss you and love you Mom-mom, but I'm so HAPPY and even a little jealous for more pain, no more tears for you.

Obituary and Arrangements

Our dearest friends and family,

We want to thank you for your continued prayer and support throughout these last few weeks. Mom-mom went home to be with her savior on Tuesday August 10. The obituary can be found here. The viewings and services are as follows:

Maryland Services

Friday August 13, 2010
2:00 - 4:00 PM
4:00 - 6:00 PM
495 Ritchie Hwy.
Severna Park, MD 21146

Memorial Service
Saturday August 14, 2010
11:00 AM
8422 Elvaton Rd.
Millersville, MD 21108

South Carolina Services

Monday August 16, 2010
9:30 - 11:00 AM
495 North Main Street
Bishopville, SC 29010

Graveside Service
Monday August 16, 2010
11:30 AM
2980 Camden Hwy.
Bishopville, SC 29010

Saying goodbye...

It seems as though one of the worst things that could happen is happening...right now...and I can't do a thing to stop it.

My precious, sweet, loving, caring, GIVING, amazing, strong, feisty, stubborn, (I could go on) Mom-mom is dying.  I spent the better part of last week praying with her, spending precious time with family, and hoping for healing.  I still pray and hope, but at the beginning of next week, she's going home.  Home to the house she's lived in since I was in High School.  Home to a bedroom with a hospital bed and a nurse.  Home to the place where her body is going to wear out.  I know this sounds depressing, but my heart is truly sad.

Her worn out body is full of infection and pneumonia on top of the effects of last week's stroke.  She has a feeding tube in her nose that constantly drips into her stomach.  She's on an IV b/c she cannot swallow or drink.  She's in and out of consciousness.  She knows who is speaking to her and hears what they are saying, but cannot speak in return. 

My hope now rests in the fact that soon she will be free from pain and fear.  We serve an amazing God who saves us from all pain.  Miracles happen daily and I refuse to limit God's ability to save her from this and grant her a full recovery here on Earth, but I also know the reality that life on Earth is mortal.  Eternal life is only by the grace of God. 

Mom-mom, I love you and will continue to hope and pray and honor you the best way that I can.  You are the BEST grandmother a girl could ever ask for.  You have taught me so many things.  One of those things is love.  I pray that I will be able to continue to love as you have.  You never gave up on your family and look at us.  We're finally together again.  I pray we don't lose these bonds that we're re-building.  I promise to do the best that I can to keep us together and to love just as you've taught me how.  And if God decides to heal you?  Well I will praise Him just the same as I will if and when He chooses to to take you HOME!  I love you Mom-mom.

Stream of (barely) consciousness...

Most, if not all of you, know that my Mom-mom had surgery this morning.  The Drs. were confident that she had a severe blockage in the carotid artery and that as a result of the stroke she had earlier in the month she needed surgery to bypass the blockage.  Well, when they went to put the stent in this morning, they found it was not necessary.  In recovery, she suffered another stroke...

I'm still waiting on details, but in the meantime I am at work waiting...watching the clock...trying unnsuccessfully to be productive...feeling guilty because I can only concentrate on one grandmother (Mom-mom.)

A co-worker and friend reminded me that "God is the GREAT PHYSICIAN."  I believe that, but am honestly struggling right now.  I haven't really ever had to deal with death; not when it came to a close family member anyhow.  When I was in college and my Mom had colon cancer, I refused to even consider death as an option.  Now, I find myself thinking about it often.  Too many what ifs over the past few weeks.  What if...

...they can't do surgery and she dies?
...she has another stroke before the surgery and doesn't make it?
...they can't put the stent in and have to do emergency bypass?
...the surgery is successful and everythings ok?

Never did I think what if the surgery is completely unnecessary and she'd have another stroke in recovery.

As I sit here waiting for more news, I am comforted by one thing about death, specifically regarding my precious Mom-mom.  She will be in heaven...there's NO doubt in my mind.  That's OBVIOUSLY not what I want to be thinking about, but right now, there's no controlling the thoughts that just roll across my thick head.

If you're reading this, then I hope that you will pray with me.  I'm reminded of Isaiah 55:8-9,

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD.
For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts."

God is and will continue to be in control and regardless of what happens next, I'm comforted by this.


It's been a while...

Ok, so it's been a while since one of us has blogged. I bet you think I'm gonna blog about our new house.

No such luck...sorry.

I want to tell you about my new MONEY SAVING PLAN...HOBBY...ADDICTION... yeah that's better.


I'm not sure if it's just a "southern" fad, a soccer mom* thing, or just another phase in life, but SO many people here are couponing. This is more than just heading over to the 'ole walmarts with the current weeks newspaper coupons. There are rules, and specific store policies (because someone always has to push the limits), and all different ways to find coupons. A friend of mine once told me that she "made" money shopping at CVS, and I didn't really understand, but the other day I spent $6 out of pocket (or oop in "coupon lingo") for a ton of stuff.

2 nights ago, I went to Harris Teeter, the expensive grocery store and bought all of this:

for only $9.62!

And I'm just a "beginner."

Of course it may not seem like there are many items in the photo, but let me give you a quick list:

6 pink lady apples
8 cans of Alpo Dog food (makes for a Happy Jack)
2 six packs of Mott's Applesauce
2 four packs of dole parfait cups
4 four packs of dole gel cups
3 four pack of yo-plus yogurt
64 oz. welch's juice
1 herbal essences shampoo
1 herbal essences conditioner

Harris Teeter was having their "super doubles" coupon sale, so this was more than worth the trip just for all the freebies I could snag. The most expensive thing I purchased were the apples @ 2.87.

***WARNING***Here's where I ramble about how I really should've paid less. I know it seems stingy, but dang, I worked hard to put my shopping list together. (Ok, ok, I copied it from here...God bless you Jenny @ Southern Savers... but really, it takes time to print all those coupons, and cutting them out...well let's just say, I think I'm developing some serious scissor calluses.)

Rambling ensues:

To be quite frank, I SHOULD have paid 3.50 less than the total for all of this. It was late when I went...I like it this way, b/c stores are SO empty at 10:00PM (with the exception of nosey soccer moms*.) When I got to the register, only the self-checkouts were open. I checked the items out, counted the amount of each value of the coupons I had, and handed them over. Some of my coupons would not double in their system, and somehow in the mix of things, one $1 coupon didn't even scan. I tried to go over each of the coupons with the gentleman at the checkout (it was REALLY slow, so there weren't any annoyed shoppers in line behind me.) He was so sweet and was about to adjust the incorrect coupons when another employee decided to get in the middle of the situation. She explained why a few of them didn't completely double. I actually had coupons worth more than the product cost and they don't give overages. Okay, no biggie...I was satisfied with her response (hey I'm still new at this,) but there were still a few coupons that I questioned. Some nosy shopper decided she needed to be helpful and explain the store's policy to me while all this was going on. At this point, I was pretty frustrated, so I just paid, but when I got to the car and looked over my receipt, I found the mistakes. I've decided from now on that it's best to avoid the self checkouts because you can't monitor the coupons as they're scanned. Unless of course I'm in Food Lion or Lowe's Foods, b/c I can scan my own there.

Okay, rambling over...maybe tomorrow, I'll tell you about how I spent $.98 on 3 glade oil tins and 1 refill pack at Target! G'night!

*No soccer mom's were harmed (and hopefully non offended) during the writing/reading of this post.

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